As any school child could tell you, it's a well known fact that arachnids and fruit pair very well, the two flavors always compliment each other. A very popular treat throughout the tropics is Banana Tarantula Surprise (surprise, there's a tarantula living in this bunch of bananas). Spiders in bananas is amateur hour, I'm going blueberry scorpion. To get to the beastie I have to keep this horror in my mouth until it's candy shell has disintegrated. It isn't a small lollipop either it's about an inch and a half to two inches long.
 |
| Release me. |
As it starts to get free, I find a rather disconcerting problem (there really isn't anything about this I find comfortable), scorpions are pointy. Even though it had it's stinger removed prior to entombment, it still has it's pinchy claws and wicked little legs. This is somehow worse than a Tootsie Pop, although less likely to require massive dental work afterwards.
 |
| Soon I shall be free. |
With the head released, it has gotten even more creepy. I keep wondering if the eyes are going to stay in place or have I already eaten them. I really can't taste anything other than the blueberry (which I'm getting tired of), but it does feel like I've got twigs and dirt in my mouth.
 |
| Come closer so I can pinch you. |
Moment of truth, I have battled my enemy to the point where I think I can actually take a bite without having to get fitted for dentures. For good or ill, I must meet my destiny.
 |
| This isn't over, human. |
Ugh. Ugh. Well that was unpleasant. Kind of like trying to eat a dirty fingernail. There's a reason people peel their shrimp and de-shell lobsters, chitin doesn't taste good and feel horrible in your mouth. Now you'll have to pardon me, I need to brush my teeth and drink until I've forgotten this ever happened.
Found at Hotlix.com which specializes in insect candies (and will haunt my nightmares)
Donated by Sam (who has lost her food recommendation privileges for quite a while)
No comments:
Post a Comment